Wednesday, April 23, 2008

the theme of life is really departure

It's strange how everything always seems to be disappearing just when you had finally gotten the hang of things, of people. In high school, I couldn't wait for everything to be over. I wanted it to end. I loved the people around me and the routine I'd fallen into but I knew I was over it. There was a point when I just got over all of it.

Why is it so different now? It took me five years to finish a four year course not out of the inability to accomplish the academic requirements but because of an incapacity, on my part, to want to accomplish them. I was too busy doing other things. I traded one group of friends for another and then another. I wanted to experience everything, so I did. Not attending classes for two months, feigned illnesses at the infirmiry, failing miserably, finding things I was never supposed to be good at, falling in love with people I would never have met if I had lived college life otherwise.

It's crazy. Life is crazy. Just when you get the hang of people, they leave. Just when people get the hang of me, I need to leave as well. Nothing is permanent. But sometimes you can love people so much that you do your best to make them stay on despite the fact that there's barely anything there to keep you together. Barely.

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