Saturday, October 17, 2009

staring at the pavement

how great would the distance have to be in order to separate two people and keep them apart so effectively that they remain strangers? leagues? miles? metres? feet? how far would i have to be for you to stop searching?

it takes 506, 506 steps, from your door to mine. it only took 506 steps for you to forget.

Friday, October 09, 2009

Waiting on the Seventh Coalition

"Never in this weather," she said. Jaw set. Eyes steeled. Emphasis on NEVER. It was something she did often. Not the remark but rather the brushing off of a request the approval of which I would have gone through chest-high flood waters for. I shrug, "Okay." Add a small wink to the disyllabic reply, a hint of a smile, little nuances that fail to cushion the impact of an all-too-quick rejection.

Do you want to grab dinner? Hang out? Movie? Coffee? A small slice of cake? Donut? Just five minutes? Seconds? Four? "I've eaten." "I'm with friends." "Seen it." "Not in the mood." "Had one already." "Busy." "Can't." "Sorry."

I take it, all of it, knowing full well the names reserved for people like me. It is a daunting task, scaling the fortress you've put around yourself, but I forge on nonetheless. It is a futile war, one I know I must fight despite foreseeable failure. Your favor, cold queen, does not shine where my weight-worn shoes tread. Still, I march towards my Waterloo.

"Never in this weather," she said. "Okay," I reply. The battle will resume when the grounds have dried from the night's rain.

Wednesday, October 07, 2009


these rooms are quiet now with sheets that are unslept in.
noises steal in from the streets. the air within these four walls are stock-still.

time is marked by the third hand. tick. tick. tick. tick.
purgatory must give more solace than this. tick. tick. tick.

it's harder than i thought and the heart screams for you to come back.
come back.

let small blessings come as the children of reason and distraction.
i made my choice and the rooms will remain silent.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009



stuck in the crevices of connotation

how does one,pray tell,confess
the inner confines of the soul?

the forms are hardly ever defined
and expression is all but sufficient

oh that you could understand, feel
the unbearable inferno at this core

that articulation could linger
in the nooks afforded by innovation

that expression could be inspired
beyond the guise of convention

that love and fear, joy and doubt be fulfilled
in the crevices of connotation

all that would remain would be a solitary fading ember
if the fires of this hell were cooled by a long-yearned for utterance

rusty pen

old words, used moments wrack me
it is a disquiet that will not cease

torn images, yellowed pages resurface
and sordid guilt grips tighter from within

broken touch, shattered pleas resume unwanted
the undertow is strong and it will not be quelled

one memory persists despite the struggle to overcome:
you, seeing you, loving you, knowing happiness.